The Discomfort Zone

The most rewarding actions is those taken outside of your comfort zone

Imagine this: Imagine your comfort zone is a sphere. Imagine an inflated balloon. You, in general, - imagine yourself as a marble - move through your comfort zone in your daily life. You move in 3 directions, because you're not always doing the same thing. But if you're content, you're living within that bubble that is our comfort zone. Now imagine a sphere, a giant ball that fits in the room you're in. The walls of the giant ball are your limits! You, the marble, usually lives within that balloon floating in the room, but your limits in various areas of life span much farther that what you're used to.  Not everyone has the same limits, but we all have them. And we also have limits of our comfort zone. Our potential is that giant bubble, whereas where we are is not quite there. Everytime you push yourself on the edge of your comfort zone, 

[Reference : http://bemindfulnow.com/?p=549]

6 months on a budget - Pros and Cons

It's been about 6 months - it will be at the end of this month - since I started being conscientious of my purchases to quit buying useless things and to save money. 

The initial idea last July was "let's see if we can save 1000$ each to buy a drone" but in the end, a drone wasn't worth 1000$ to me, but it was still useful for me to see if truly I could minimize my spending. 

So, after about 6 months, here are the observations I’ve made:

The positives

1.       More conscious of my tendencies and shopping habits

I do have a tendency to shop every 2-3 months and buy for a few hundred dollars. For example, when I come across cool and fashionable tendencies, it makes me want some of my own (PINEAPPLES!!). When there is a change in seasons, like the fall collection is out in a store I like, I have a tendency to want a new wardrobe, or spend a few hundred dollars on some new items.  Christmas also meant I wanted to have a bunch of extra seasonal items, like Christmas decorations for the tree (even though we already had a bunch), nice table decor for having people over (even though I hadn't had plans to host anyone), nice house decorations (but not enough space for new stuff!!) and of course gifts! I have a tendency to buy in excess, sometimes buying gifts even when I don't have a person in mind! (Are you an over-buyer or under-buyer?)

2.     I did become a mindful spender

With every purchase I questioned myself on the usefulness of what I wanted to buy and if I really had a use in mind, one that would last beyond one season.

Although on this project I don’t concentrate on saving money on groceries and going to the restaurant (dates or social activities), I’ve become a bit more conscious and smart about spending, for example “I spent a lot on fancy ingredients last month, I should focus on using them up or using my frozen items this month”.

I don’t actually have a numerical budget, as getting into the metrics would be a whole other project that I’m not willing to get into now (which I can do because I am not in debt, thankfully).

3.     I did buy less of certain items

I saved some money by not spending on delicious tea from my favorite tea store DavidsTea, books (since I already have a bunch I didn’t read), seasonal items (except some hand soaps………), home decorations (except a few that provided happy memories and those that my mister wanted to incorporate into our home – I didn’t want him to be negatively affected by my budgeting exercise)…

4.     More enjoyment from the things I do own

Not buying the new teas at DavidsTea was difficult, but I also was able to enjoy all the teas I do have, and benefit from the enjoyment of finishing a pack of tea that I’ve had for a while!

Not buying new books, I was able to pick up a book I already had and still hadn’t read!

5.     I became more generous

Since I didn’t want to spend money to fill up my home with useless stuff, I couldn’t buy myself the awesome cute amazing thing I found at that store I love, but someone else could benefit! I allowed myself to be a bit more generous with gifts. A little gift for a friend who was celebrating a birthday, a care package for a sick family member, an extra generous gift this year for Christmas.

The negatives

1.      I'm a little masochistic

Although I've decided not to buy things that are "fun" and "cool" but useless, or just temporary useful, I'm still subscribed to newsletters of my favorite stores, some that are stocked with temporary useful objects (Like Indigo Bookstore!). And not just that, I peruse the sales for "essential" items that are also awesome. The inner dialogue that it causes is less than pleasant as I go from "yes I want it so bad!" to "no, i don't need it" back and forth for several minutes, and sometimes several times in a day or week. When seasonal items, which I've sworn off, go on sale, it's torture and a half . I know I'd feel temporary pleasure, but I'd also use said items during a specific season. A great example of this was the pumpkin tureen in a previous blog post of my biggest teases!

2.     I still spent money

I bought a few cake pedestals for taking better pictures of my Gateaux Dulce cakes, some clothing when I ruined a couple items in the wash, some gorgeous frames to finally display some beautiful pictures from our Italy vacation, some hand soaps with holiday scents (hey, they’re consumable!), etc. As mentioned in the positives, I also was more generous in gifts! So, in terms of saving dollars, I’m not sure I succeeded much in that department.

In the end, there are more positives than negatives so the overall conclusion is it’s a good thing which I will be continuing for the next few months and hopefully beyond, setting good habits for the future!

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Any ideas for saving money? What are some of your pros and cons of mindful spending?

Christmas on a budget

After taking steps to spend less on new things for the thrill of new things, and only on things that I truly need, or would allow me to grow, in other words, Christmas is a challenging time of year. 

I was about to send emails to everyone in my family saying "please don't give me gifts this year" or "please donate to charity instead", and "I don't want to spend money on things that won't necessarily make you happier, so please tell me what you really want for Christmas", but writing those emails turned out to be much for difficult than I expected. It also dawned on me that it was incredibly insensitive and selfish, especially doing such requests by email and not in person or by phone. 

First, giving gifts can be a wonderful happiness boost to anyone doing the giving. The experience between two people of giving of and receiving a gift can be a good bonding exercise. And asking for what my family actually wants could take the fun out of it, by eliminating the element of surprise. So I was faced with a tough decision. Make a change or keep up the family traditions. 

Traditions are important towards happiness, as I've learned recently having started reading The Happiness Project, by Gretchen Rubin. And I didn't want to stir up anything by straying away from traditions. On the other hand, we're all grown and mixing things up can also be good for us, but it will have to wait until next year. Right now, December 17th, is much too close to Christmas to be changing our shopping lists, especially since not everyone is last minute. Once Black Friday rolls around, it's too late to change the Christmas traditions - even though Black Friday is not as popular in Canada as it is in the US, it is an excellent day to start buying gifts, as the sales are excellent! 

I've also sought out information from The Internet, our #1 source of information, sad as that is... I took advice from other people embracing minimalism that, once a year, it is okay to embrace the traditions of Christmas. We may not control what others get us, but we can send gift list ideas and give gifts that are homemade, or "experience gifts". Or, another idea was to look at what kind of gifts you'd received in the past, which indicates what that person likes. 

And as it turns out I've actually been gift-conscious for 1-2 years now, buying local produce as gifts, making homemade goodies, small tokens of appreciation, and things that I'd be sure the other enjoys, without necessarily having a gift ideas list from them. 

And so, on that note, Happy Holidays to everyone!

xo Miss K (on a budget)

Two steps forward, one step back

We, humans, are by no means perfect. So striving for perfection is futile; rather, aim for progress! Two steps forward and one step back is still progress, and so we just learn from our back-steps but they don't necessarily equal failure. 

I have to tell myself that, as I struggle to beat myself down when I buy things and I've told myself not to. But it's okay, it totally happens and it's not the end of the world. So I bought frames, at least I'm going to add photos for an added value home that showcases good memories. Not only can we learn from our mistakes, we can spin them to be positive based on our perspective. We make choices. 

The fact is that I still spend money, but rather than increasing a tea collection that I won't finish up until mid- to late- 2016, I'm spending on things that will allow me to grow in one way or another: 

1. Baking supplies

Since I started a baking business (facebook page / GateauxDulce), my time concerned on it has been little. As my entrepreneur friend Sarah told me "It's not a business if you don't have business"; she's right. I'll have to make a goal of actually selling cakes to be able to call it a business. But one thing is also certain: I will have to practice to sell beautiful cakes. And in the last month, I delivered 3 cakes including my first wedding cake. Yes, I bought baking supplies, but I've got 4 potential orders in the backlog : one where I will make cupcakes in exchange for a bottle of port, one birthday cake (scheduled), one gluten-free cake (potential), and I'll be having some bake sales at work to raise funds for charity. 

Look at what I've been able to accomplish with some supplies!! I'm so very proud!

2. Frames

I have been staring at these frames for a long time ...They're on page 12 of my Indigo Wishlist!!! Yes, the plan always has been and still is to print photos from Italy (and possibly some of Greece) that are relaxing to always think about our trip when I see the pictures, recollecting good souvenirs. There is a lot of benefit added to this personal project. One, I won't be accomplishing it on my own, therefore a couple's project. Two, finally get rid of those ikea frames that mean nothing. Three, increased happiness from reminiscing of happy moments abroad. And I got them at 25% off! YAY!

3. Cake pedestals

Okay I totally did not NEED cake pedestals, but it ended up being worth it, especially one with a ruffle that (not shown) was used to display the wedding cake shown above. The result was so beautiful, it brought emotion to my throat (i.e. the step before tears to my eyes). I got one beautiful china one for a 6" cake, one 8-9" white ceramic ruffle one that I just mentioned, and one made of wood (actually I bought a wood round cake board and a wood carved candle stick, which, when used together, can make a nice rustic-look pedestal). They do take a lot of room yes, but they are worth it. Why? Because taking beautiful pictures of cakes is part of growing the business. It's part of the marketing, and the way one gets likes on social media! Very important. I shall however restrain myself from making additional cake pedestal purchases! So here is the final selection:

4. Gifts 

Since I don't want to spend money on useless gifts for myself, things that give instant gratification, things may not remain interesting for very long, then I allow myself to do so towards another. They might not like the gift but our relationship is better because I've put a little extra time considering what may make them feel good. I put together a care package recently, and although it wasn't cheap, it was worth it!

5. Experiences

Even though I try to cut down on spending, I actually do still spend about the same  amount of money in total, because we go out to eat every now and then, we go to shows. I attended the SAQ Grande Degustation last week, and I'll be going to Sugar Sammy on December 5th! Looking forward to that! Experiences we grow from, we create memories, and sure it takes funds, but in the end, it's worth it and that's what you really need to think about when making purchases!



So the lesson is, not all first perceived failures can really be described as failures, as I am still progressing and I buy things with value added. I ask myself "Is it worth it?" and "Will I take enjoyment from this in the long term?", and if the answer is yes, then go for it! 

Money concerns both people in a couple.

It happened on a normal evening, all I did was say that I didn't want to buy an expensive new coffee machine, even though yes the coffee did sound delicious. I said I'm trying not to spend on things I didn't need, and I said I was aiming for a minimalist lifestyle. The word "minimalist" set off a bomb of fear from my partner, he freaked-out at the thought of a radical change in my lifestyle that did not include him. Here's an article for you, mister: The Minimalists (click the link for full article).

Minimalism is not a radical lifestyle. Minimalism is a tool I use to get rid of unnecessary stuff and live a meaningful life—a life filled with happiness, freedom, and conscious awareness.

Since we had some big discussion about the purchase of a drone a few months back, it started with a friendly competition on who can save the most money (however difficult that is to measure) and it turned into a serious evaluation of my spending habits. On my birthday I received a cookbook and for the first time I did not want a cookbook, because I already maximized the space I had for cookbooks, but I started noticing all around how many things I had bought because I knew I needed or wanted, and now I have a serious lack of space everywhere in our house. 

A house, so roomy compared to an apartment, so I've permitted myself to own more things, but now, now I realize how so many things get lost and how I don't remember where I've placed certain things, and how they don't actually bring me happiness. Basically, I just have too much stuff, and  like a drop that makes the vase overflow, I realized it all at once, all it took was one too many cookbooks.  

But back to the point, the reason he freaked out was probably related to some fears that I'm losing my mind or that life will become boring, based on his views of what "minimalism" meant, but isn't necessarily the same as what I understand it to be. 

But this led me to wonder to what extent did my minimalism journey negatively affect others while benefiting me? How many expenditures can I really cut when the partner in my life is not cutting out unnecessary expenses? Does beautifying our home and buying kitchen gadgets to make our common lives better fit into the "useless spending" category? Where is the line between fun, useful and meaningful? I've got to think of it before making a decision. For example, perhaps buying frames for travel photos might be okay (will bring us both happiness) while a new coffee machine might not be okay (only bringing him happiness). 

But even then, couple life is about compromises and so I will probably end up still purchasing items that I don't particularly enjoy,  but he does and so I concede. That can happen.

Sources of inspiration 

1. Blonde on a Budget http://blondeonabudget.ca/2014/07/07/the-year-i-plan-to-embrace-minimalism/

Biggest tease list!

This blog entry is about $MONEY$! and my no-spending diet. 

It's been pretty difficult to resist spending, and I'm very masochistic in the fact that I am still subscribed to receive updates from my favorite online stores! I'm sharing below a list of items that I've been dying to own, but......but I must resist. And so they continue to be online big teases, and I shall resist! 

But I need to share the list, perhaps to bring me some closure. I used to have a diary, in which I would jot down ideas and make pros/cons list and almost always, I'd discover something while writing that gave me a sense of peace or understanding. I never know in advance what I'm going to write, and maybe an idea will come to me that will actually bring me closure, and then I will have achieved my goal for today. 

1. ModCloth No International Shipping promotion!

ModCloth is having a sale where shipping is free for international shipping! I live in Canada, and ModCloth works in the USA, so shipping to Canada is less than ideal. I bought a skirt and a handtowel, coming out to about 100$ after tax, in US dollars, so that meant I had to pay the bank's exchange rate + a 2.5% credit card fee for the foreign currency. Then, the shipping, the shipping! The shipping base rate was around 20$ (I can't remember exactly), and then the customs ! The customs fee was another 20-30$. So the whole thing cost me an arm, and it is a major source of lost money. See, if I lived in the USA, I'd be able to get free return shipping, and if the total cost is above a certain amount, free shipping to your house as well! 

I love ModCloth, since they have so many 40s and 50s style dresses (as well as other eras), but this is a style I seriously love, I almost wish I lived in that era with the dresses and the music (but at the same time, I'm happy I live in this era, where I am able to work and have an independent life, independent on the income of a man, for example). They have so many cool and quirky styles and objects, and so many pretty dresses, I want so many items. 

So I think you now understand why this deal here is a total tease +100.  

2. Indigo Chapters Home : Pumpkin-shaped Soup Tureen

So not only is this soup tureen super awesome, because let's be honest, it could be used for Halloween including for Halloween candy, but also for soup, which is useful when you are serving soup to the table, but also for whatever else you may want to serve during the fall when you invite some people over. 

But no, that's not all. Now, it's on SALE!!! And now I also want a little soup bowl, which is similar, but yes smaller, which I could use for Halloween candy! I could have a Halloween or "Friendsgiving" party, and have these bowls out and I'd be such an awesome host! And they won't have this next year, so I must have it this year! No, there will never me fall or Halloween decorations sold at Indigo ever again! Hahaha

I actually already have a couple soup bowls, about the size of onion soup bowls, in the shape of pumpkins and they are orange! with a handle, like a mug, but also a cover, like a pumpkin, so they are cool. And for this reason, I am telling myself I do not need another pumpkin shaped dish. (but I do!) 

But these thoughts are exactly why I am trying not to spend this year. What is this dependence on "new products" that I am experiencing?!?  Something i want to eliminate from my emotions list. I mean, other than the occasional treat of course, but I will have to wait until July 2016 for that! (or find other ways to treat myself)

3. DavidsTea sales and promotions

DavidsTea is my greatest enemy at this time. It is the thing that I own the most of and the thing that I need to cut back on purchasing the most. Sure it's a consumable product, but I buy it at a higher rate than I consume it, and that's become overwhelming, as in it takes too much space in my cupboards. Space I could use for more useful kitchen tools. 

Here's the latest and greatest:

I actually was able to resist the end-of-summer 40% off sale, I am so surprised and at the same time proud of myself for resisting. I would check the specials regularly, and calculate which tea products were worth more bang for the buck, and then I even made a shopping list for myself (several times). I filled then emptied my "cart" many times. The thing I hate about DavidsTea's website, that the cart get's emptied if you close the window (unlike Indigo), has become a good thing, because I'd refill the cart many times, and realized how I really didn't need these items. Even though I really really wanted them! 

So this special, you only need to buy 50$ of stuff (normally it's like 75$) and you get a 20$ gift! So nice! I'm always this close to giving up my challenge just so that I could have a candle that smells like crisp apples! But then again, I could actually eat a crisp apple, or make apple crisp! (haha!) Or better yet, sniff the pumpkin candle I do own! 

I'm always this close to breaking my rule to have some extra Pumpkin Chai in my cupboard. It's my favorite tea.... Can I make an exception? The reason I'm wavering is that I have about 8 teacups worth left of that tea. Is that enough? That is the question!

So that's my list. I hope I can be able to resist further! Wish me luck!

Happy K

The No-Spending Diet

I'm doing a no-spending diet. I'm trying to see how much I can not-spend between July 2015 and July 2016. Of course, measuring savings is actually quite difficult. How can I guarantee I would have bought that item I want, and didn't buy it just because I'm on a no-spending diet? I can't. 

The rules:

Things I can buy:
- Groceries : I am allowed to buy regular and fancy groceries, as long as I use everything before it goes bad, and that I don't leave canned goods and other non-perishable items forever and ever without using. I must also consume canned goods and other non-perishable items that have been in my pantry for over a year, or else donate them at food drives.
- Clothing: only when something needs replacing. I gave myself an exception for ModCloth when I went to San Francisco and I got some bras because I haven't gotten new undergarments since forever.
- Gifts: because I am choosing minimalism, not others.
- House items: if both Benoit and I agree that we NEED it. 
- Baking items: only if I it is for an order or if there is a concrete plan in place to sell goodies created with that item.
- Vacation: normal purchases are allowed on vacation, provided that I evaluate the want vs. the need (esp. for souvenirs).

Things I must not buy:
- Tea. I must not buy new tea from DavidsTea or other until I am left with less than 10 teas in my cupboard. 
- Anything from Indigo. Especially not decorative seasonal items, and anything in the paper department (journals, notepads, etc.)
- Books: I must not buy books. Not until I have read all the books that I currently own that are unread. 
- Gift decorating items: such as wrapping paper, bows, labels and ribbons. Although I am allowed to buy gifts, I am not allowed to buy gift decorating things. I may not have everything, but I have too much wrapping paper, and I need to start using it.

Now accepting bets on how long I will be able to last! I'll try to keep this blog updated on related thoughts, challenges and savings.

Laters,
Miss K on a Budget