Bookmarks of kindness

There are a lot of websites and blogs dedicated to making random people happy. It's crazy how many people experience a down and are in need of kindness to pick up their moods and make their days brighter. I'm one of them! 

Here are a few inspirational websites and blogs I'd like to share:

- Operation Beautiful, who posts sticky notes anonymously anywhere to promote positive self-image, and posts notes of other people around the globe. Here are some interesting sites as part of her resources. 
- Secret Agent L, who drops small gifts anonymously around her city (and the help of affiliated agents in other cities) to improve people's days and moods. One person performed 21 acts of kindness on her birthday instead of receiving gifts: now, that's inspirational!

- Random Acts of Kindness, which is a foundation to promote random good deeds. Here's a list of ideas.  Turns out, we just missed World Kindness Day (Wednesday, November 13th, 2013) but I'm happy to know that I was writing happy sticky notes on that day!

- More love letters, who writes love letters to people who send in snail-mail addresses. I think now, people everywhere are sending mini-notes, similarly to Operation Beautiful. People everywhere are also responding to love letter requests.
-You Are Remarkable, which is dedicated to making people feel loved, important, and remarkable in every way. 
-Hope is in the cards, which simply encourages us to send notes of "hope" with thanks or encouragement. 
-Pay it forward, which lists acts of kindness to perform and hopefully the receiver will pay it forward. I like this E-How link: How to Pay it Forward.
-Love Anonymously, which is sort of what started my blog and journey here. Here is a list of some interesting kindness sites. 
-Color Me Katie, which is just Katie doing random colorful happy activities, but all the posts just make you happy! For example this post, How to make a bad day better. 

And that's all I have right now, but I'm sure there will be many more added to this list in the coming months. 

Smile!

My mental health...

If anyone lives a life inside their head, it's me. It's a negative life that is slowly destroying me. I just need to tell myself "STOP"

STOP comparing yourself to others
STOP trying to change who you are
STOP focusing on things that upset you
STOP being obsessed with getting others to like you
STOP thinking you have ruined your life
STOP trying to fix a broken relationship
STOP procrastinating
STOP feeling sorry for yourself
STOP wondering what everyone else is thinking about
STOP trying to get others to feel sorry for you
STOP over-analyzing
STOP over-thinking
STOP gossiping to make yourself feel better

How?
How do I stop thinking about it?
How do I stop talking in my head, listening and feeling bad?
How do I focus on my work when all this is happening in my head?

DO list things to you like about yourself instead
DO try solving your problems on your own directly (don't linger)
DO act fast without thinking too much about it first (the longer you wait the worse it'll be)
DO smile, sit up straight (at least you're projecting happy self-image)
DO communicate issues at the beginning
DO communicate gratitude and happiness
DO take a moment to relax mentally, meditate, relax your tense muscles
DO hang out with people who care for you too

Mental Health for a Man

Hi there.

In the hours since I have become a member of Movember, I have been curiouser and curiouser about what mental issues plagues a man, if any, and what methods (quotes or other means of sharing knowledge...) can help reduce mental problems in the masculine population. 

My logic to date, since yesterday, has been that some men need verbal assurance like women do...but I somehow think the percentage of men is very small. Should I post things like "you are good enough" or "you are awesome"? Or should I try a different approach such as manly inspirational quotes (like yesterday's post-it note)? It's difficult finding suitable quotes for men. 

Today, I found a site called "The Art of Manliness", which is totally awesome!! There is a random post button which is great, and I totally want one. The entire site has manly font and old fashioned pictures which I totally love. (It reminds me of this book "Let's bring back" which lists great old-fashioned activities that aren't popular anymore.) So, I found a page of TONS of manly inspirational quotes on their site. They say that there is a lack of manly quotes on the internet and I totally agree! On this website, they post a few quotes with black and white images of manly men and I think it would be a good idea to print these images and post them as my random notes of Movember awareness.  Here's a good one. I'll print it and post it somewhere in the hallways.



On a side note, since a guy I know told me once he looks up to Georges St-Pierre, the quebecois boxer, I thought of looking up some inspirational quotes from him too. I found some! Here's one:


I'm on it.

Over and out.

Movember

Good day to all, 

It's halfway through Movember, the time when men all over the world are growing mustaches to promote awareness of men's health issues such as prostate cancer, testicular cancer, and mental health problems. I've known about the promotion of awareness of the men cancers since a few years, but I just learned today that there is also the mental health side of it. Mental health affects women and men alike, but they react and deal with it differently. For example, I'm not sure to what extent men experience anxiety, stress and depression and whether it has anything to do with self-image, self-confidence and relationships with others. I am participating in Operation Beautiful but I feel that it's mainly aimed at women. I want to help men also and I want to prevent mental health issues for both men and women, but what do you tell a man to reduce his risk of depression, anxiety and stress. For me it's obvious that women need confidence boosts by being told you are beautiful, inside and out, that you are worth more than you think. Women have trouble acknowledging how awesome they are. On the other hand, what drives men's insecurities? To me, a woman, it looks like men DO acknowledge that they are awesome. I'm sure many don't but, to us women, men come off confident and worry-free most of the time. I think what happens is that men don't often share their feelings, or even acknowledge them at all, and what causes the stress/anxiety/depression is absent until it hits. Do men get emotional warning signs as much as women do? It's crazy - no one can ever know. Since they bottle up (or have less) emotions, then what do they need to be told to prevent stress?

So, I've decided to join Movember... a little late, but better late than never. Visit my Mo Sista page! I've committed to creating positive self-image to men around my workplace (90% men) and in my life. I'll do so with random post-it notes with inspirational manly quotes, and by dropping out the occasional compliment (or trying to... I'm shy in that department). I'll be taking photos of post-it notes and they might appear on the Operation Beautiful website before the end of the month!

Here's my first message:

Manly, right? I wonder what other manly yet inspiring messages I could write... it's a difficult subject!

I'll also be fundraising in the 11 days I have left...with a bake sale! One thing that makes me happy is baking and I believe I am pretty good at it, and I will be putting smiles on my male coworkers' (and female coworker's) faces. That's what I call good mental health!! 

Until next time,
Happy K-Stache

Inspirational Sounds Sunday

5 songs to find inspiration, to be a better me, to find inner peace, to love myself!

1. Stronger - Kelly Clarkson

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone
What doesn't kill you makes a fighter
Footsteps even lighter
Doesn't mean I'm over 'cause you're gone

2. The Climb - Miley Cyrus

There's always going to be another mountain
I'm always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle,
Sometimes you going to have to lose,
Ain't about how fast I get there,
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb

3. So much love - Fedde Le Grand

The only lyric to mention here is "I've got so much love to give".

4. Invincible - Hedley

I've come a long, long way,
Made a lot of mistakes,
But I'm breathing, breathing,
That's right
And I mean it, mean it
This time
I'm a little run down,
I've been living out loud.
I can beat it, beat it,
That's right,
'cause I'm feeling, feeling,
Invincible.

5. Inner Ninja - Classified

I read the rules before I broke 'em
I broke the chains before they choked me out
And I pay close attention
Really learn the code
I learned to read the map before I hit the road

Nobody's gonna see me comin'
Nobody's gonna hear a sound
No matter how hard they tryin'
No stoppin' me since I've found
My inner ninja

Find some other ones on this link: http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/30-inspirational-songs-that-keep-you-motivated-for-life.html

Lesson in Confidence

I seriously lack self-confidence. Everything that goes wrong makes me feel awful, sad, guilty, etc. My insecurity causes trouble in my work and my relationships. My parents and my sister are also insecure so, I don't have to look far to see where I got it. If I could be confident, that would cause all my problems to disappear, and there will be more happy feelings!

So, the first step in being confident is pretending to be confident! So, according to this website, Nerd Fitness (hilarious!!!), there are 5 things to do to appear confident. And, according to me, confidence will follow!

1. Improve your posture (yes, I really do need to work on this!)
2. Slow down, i.e. talk slower 
3. Smile (this is true. Smiling improves any situation. It's not just the mouth, but you have to bring up your eyebrows, let your face, ears even, move to the smile! Sounds weird, but after focusing on your muscles, you'll know what I'm talking about!)
4. Win the staring contest, i.e. look into the person's eyes - yes this is also something I need to work on. I look up, down, left, right, glance at their eyes, when I talk, and look at their mouth when they speak. It's so weird focusing on their eyes. Thinking about it as a game helps! I like this line "you’ll quickly learn that everybody else is nervous as hell too and will quickly look away given enough time." Hahaha!
5. Get out of your head, that is, don't over-analyze, don't over-think, don't wait it out. Get the awkward out right away, it's the worst part anyway. Speaking of which, that's what I was avoiding as I write this... Like he says, "Part of building confidence is taking risks and having the ability (and the guts) to do stuff that scares you."

And finally Don’t change what you are, just learn to be more confident in who you are.

Love, K

I made a cake!

Hello ... I haven't posted any food-related message yet... Food makes me happy. Well, here's the first one! 

I made a cake for my nephew's birthday! Here is the cake that I made: 
 

Mmmmmm doesn't it look delicious?! Cake does make me happy! So does baking! I didn't have much time to prepare it though, I slept in from a Halloween party the night before and ended up having to make shortcuts to create a delicious but simple enough cake! It's a good thing that I have a Pinterest board and that I am pretty familiar with it to pick out the cakes and methods I want to try out!

So, what I made is a dark chocolate cake with pumpkin-flavoured whipped cream topping and dark chocolate shavings. 

Ok so I started with a bookmarked cake photo that just looks delicious. This one is a chocolate buttermilk cake with Earl Grey meringue frosting and salted caramel drizzle, which I found on a blog called Raspberri Cupcakes. Honestly looks fantastic! And the fact that this blogger uses tea to flavour the icing is awesome, since I am a huge tea lover and it actually inspired my icing. 


But I was making this cake for my 8 year-old nephew and well, I don't think he's much into the Earl Grey flavour. Since I have many teas, I went through them, then decided that the winner is my favorite autumn tea from DavidsTea, that is, Pumpkin Chai. (Oh my god !! I was looking for a web link and i realized...It no longer exists??!?! What am I going to do???) Well, I have a good supply for now fortunately!) It's a cinnamony, clovey, carrot-pumpkin blend that is amaaaaazing. 

Actually when I was at the grocery store and I tried remembering the recipe, I really though the icing from this recipe was whipped cream, so I bought a carton, but only after realized the recipe above was made with egg whites instead. Apparently you can add liquid to meringue to flavour it, but it doesn't work with cream. With whipped cream, you either have to steep the tea in the cream and let it cool/steep for several hours, or you have to mix in solids. So what I did was take about a teaspoon of my chosen tea and ground it in my spice grinder until it was powdery and just folded it into the sweetened whipped cream. I also made a small portion of strongly brewed tea and added a teaspoon to the cream... though I don't know if it's really worth it. It ended up being really tasty though! 

For the cake part, I used the chocolate cake recipe from Ricardo (1/2 recipe). 

Then for the chocolate shavings - which was super smart because both my nephew and his father always fight over who gets the chocolate pieces on a store-bought cake - I was inspired by the devil's food cake on Cafe Fernando (which features beautiful recipes). I used 3/4 of the recipe, since I had a smaller cake. You roll the parchment paper - this trick works like a charm!

Anyway, it was a success!! I surprise myself sometimes! :D

Until next time,
Happy K

Celebration Mondays

Woohoo! Guess who's post-it note made it to the Operation Beautiful's website? mine! Here's the note from my blog and here's the entry on the OB site! 

Today I found this blog called Feel Good Day which is also inspiring. Unfortunately, they haven't kept the blog up-to-date! :( Actually, when I was studying at McGill, I was part of this club! But unfortunately I wasn't very active... 

This is a great post on Operation Beautiful: some girls at a school put post-its around the bathroom's mirror. Look how awesome it looks!

Today's Post-It Phrase of the Day on OB: “You are stronger than yesterday.”

Here's my rendition, which I will post at the gym. (It also gives me an excuse to go to the gym)!

So Happy Monday everyone, remember that you are beautiful!

Update: This post-it is currently on the top banner of the OB site!! Yay me!!!

Thank you, stranger!

There is hope – someone, a stranger, just gave me a free cupcake. I asked him where he got it and he insisted I take it! Awesome!!! Ooops, I was going to take a picture of it, since it was so pretty, but I ate it before remembering! It was a vanilla cake with lemon cream cheese icing and chocolate shavings. Mmmm 

Thank you Free Cupcake Man!

Sincerely,

Inspirational Videos

1. Hedley - Anything

A hundred thousand disbelievers couldn't keep me on the ground
I've invented a momentum that'll never slow me down
I believe it 'cause I feel it and I shout it out loud
I can, I can, I can

Everybody said "boy don't go any higher"
(Uh uh, fuck that) I can do anything
"Never push the limit and don't play with fire"
(Uh uh, fuck that) I can do anything

2. Final State - Dreaming Out Loud

Cant you see that
everybody knows:

Keep on dreaming out loud now
Dont you wanna go wild now
'Cause I tried to tell you so many times before
You cant be afraid to let yourself fall
Keep on dreaming out loud now
Hey-oh, hey-oh 

Just let yourself go
Don't ever lose hope
No, you're not alone
Go get what you want

Well, I can't find the right video on the video-embedding application in Blogger, but the video is at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7lf7H0RwGQ 

3. Katy Perry - Roar

You held me down, but I got up
Already brushing off the dust
You hear my voice, you hear that sound
Like thunder gonna shake the ground
You held me down, but I got up
Get ready 'cause I've had enough
I see it all, I see it now

I got the eye of the tiger, a fighter, dancing through the fire
Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me roar
Louder, louder than a lion
Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me roar

Happy Monday!

Hi blog, 

Looks like it'll be just you and me for a while. But that's okay since I'm mostly doing this blog for me. 

I really like the Secret Agent L idea, about being generous to strangers. The interesting thing with that is that you don't stick around to see their reactions. You might brighten someone's day (likely) but it's also possible that the receiver may not take it well, may be skeptic of a free gift, or might dislike the message altogether. It's possible! Like in my previous post, where my Operation Beautiful note was found in the garbage... Not sure what happened there... So anyway, I don't think I will do Secret Agent L (or Affiliated Agent K) every week - maybe more like monthly, due to budget constraints - but I think I'll definitely put up a nice note every week! Here's one: I put it on a random car in the parking lot at work!

Celebrate Mondays!

But, because I'm starting and it's gotten me excited, I left another gift again this week: I purchased a 2$ maple-syrup scented candle at the pharmacy and left it in a locker at the gym, with a note with a clever use of the word "brighten" ! I went to the gym 2 days later and found it was still in the same locker. I didn't move it around though, but 3 days after that, it was gone! excellent! I'm glad.

Anonymous gift at the gym

At my work there is someone who I once liked very much and when he was happy, I was happy. He understood my silly sense of humor and it was great! I would sometimes give gifts such as a batch of cookies for the whole team (i knew he loved sweets) or a small joke item that was sort of like an inside-joke for us. I'd always be nice to him, since I appreciated him and appreciated his niceness towards me. But then at some point, he started refusing my helpful self and stopped being thankful for the little things, and instead started ignoring and purposefully insulting me. That was a few months ago. Things now are alright, and I'm glad, but I wouldn't go back to being my generous self just yet... not with him anyway... because it's not worth it. The thing is, it's only fun being generous when the other party is happy as a result! And that's probably something I need to work on, because willingly stopping myself from being me, the generous me I used to be, well, that too is mean, and I definitely don't want to be a mean person. 

So Secret Affiliated Agent K is kind of a compromise. I can be nice ...to strangers! and I don't have to stick around to see the reaction. I can just imagine the best! 

And I am keeping anonymity in the gifts too by only attaching the Secret Agent L card and not my own blog address!

Until next time,
-agent K

The Good Deeds Bucket List that inspired me

I'm a really big fan of Pinterest! I love it! I used to have really long lists of Bookmarks in my browser then trying to find a recipe was a nightmare. Actually, I would just Google it again and look for another decent recipe (or the same one again). So that's why I love Pinterest!

I think I must have clicked and read a posted article there, because somehow, I landed on this Bucket List of good deeds to do over 365 days. And it is really inspiring!

First of all, {Day 2} caught my eye: leaving anonymous gifts of books, journals, notes around the city like Secret Agent L (whose new site is actually www.secretagentl.com)... I do love giving gifts!! I read through many posts from the beginning of her gift-leaving, day-brightening adventures, which interestingly enough began on my birthday! haha! Well, on the first day, she left a hydrangea on the windshield of some lucky stranger whose day was uplifted significantly (most likely). Anyway, I really enjoyed reading the posts and so it made me want to become "Affiliated Agent K". And if I was going to go on Secret Agent missions, I would need to take pictures and post them somewhere! I've already printed up Secret Agent L business cards that I will be using for my random acts of kindness, which I will be documenting on this blog.

Actually, I already started! I purchased a small pack of Halloween candy for 1.50$ from the drugstore and left it and a printed business card and a post-it note saying, "Enjoy! Halloween treats are not just for kids!" on the steps between floors at my job. It was exciting but stressful, as I didn't want to be seen, and there was a lot of in/out traffic. As soon as I heard someone step into the staircase, I dropped the loot and ran off. I didn't have time to take a picture! I tried watching out for someone walking out of the staircase with the gift, but they must have been going to opposite way, since a minute later, I went to go see, and the gift was already gone! Excellent!!! This project is so exciting! :)

Next up on the Good Deeds Bucket List that has caught my eye: Operation Beautiful! This one is pretty similar to Secret Agent L, as in, you leave happy notes anonymously in random places. But this one is aimed to promote positive self-image, by writing things like "you're beautiful in every way!" and "It doesn't take a mirror to find beauty in yourself!". And god knows I would love to randomly find a similar note. Seeing the video brought a smile to my face and emotion to my heart - that's a good sign. I'm doing it! 


So on the same day, I posted a note! which I did take a picture of! I left it in the women's bathroom (see the toilet in the picture? hahaha) at my work. I have bad news though.... I came back a few hours later and found the post-it note in the garbage! The garbage!!! Paper is recyclable, sheesh! Well, maybe I pissed off a french-speaking person, or the cleaning lady came by, or someone read the note but she didn't want anyone else to have the same satisfaction? Maybe... there could be lots of reasons. Anyway, it won't stop me from trying again - I'll definitely try this one several more times!

Alright, well this was a good day!
Here's to making people happy!

The Beginning

Dear listeners,

I have been a diary keeper for most of my adult life, starting at 13 years old, and that was 15 years ago. I have recently stopped keeping a diary, something that has helped me deal with my day-to-day issues, and something that has been an outlet when I had feelings and issues I couldn't share with anyone else. It was like a friend to me, as I even wrote good news when it happened and discussed dreams. Now, I have stopped, partly because I don't have time anymore, and partly because my deep dark secrets were revealed once and my fears of getting caught were just too big to go on.

But now, about one year later, I don't want to spill horrible feelings in a journal anymore. Since some time now, I have been feeling a little down (sometimes a lot), a little depressed and often unhappy about the life I have. It's a sad thought, but what's even sadder is that I can't pinpoint what makes me feel this way . I am 28 years old and since a few years, I think I have been having my quarter-life crisis - the one where you don't know who you are, what you want, you wonder if you've chosen the right career path and the right partner, whether there is going to be more for you than the boring routine you've settled for.

I don't know if everyone goes through this crisis, but I think many people do. I imagine it must happen when you choose a career path, or when you start getting settled in your first real job, or when you realize you have been in the same routine for a long time. For me, I have done a bachelor's degree and a master's degree, totaling 6 years of university studies, and have been working for about 3 and a half years now, and I am officially in a set daily routine, and have been for more than 2 years.

Honestly, I don't know why I can't be grateful - I have a steady job with a decent salary, a house, a loving boyfriend, an adorable pet, some pretty good friends, a loving family, I have the chance to go on amazing trips, and most importantly I am healthy. Yet I feel like I've got my life all wrong, like I screwed up somewhere and can't figure out what's missing. I have all these good things that I should be happy for but that I don't appreciate. When I make the list of "good things" in my life, I have no joyful happy feelings. And more often than not, in my life, I tend to focus on the bad.

What I've heard is that you don't know what you've got until it's gone. But...is that the only way to know what you've got? To be happy? To make the best of life? I hope not. It can't be!

The reason I started this blog is to start focusing on the good stuff. I know there are a lot of blogs out there about happiness and inspiration, and finding and following your dreams, and I intend on finding my own list of favorites. I named this blog after my favorite things: kittens, pretty things (such as ribbons) and desserts (e.g. pie) - the blog title was "Kittens, Ribbons and Pie, Oh My!" - , as they are things that make me happy. It will be a sort-of yellow-brick road to happiness and self-acceptance. I want to train myself to focus on the good things in life. In the same way you train a dog to behave, you teach your children the ways of the world, and you learn math & physics at university, I'm sure you can learn to give, to be thankful, to be happy with what you've got, to love others openly and unconditionally, and especially to love yourself. 

In the next months, I'm going to :

1. Love others by continuing to be kind and generous to others. I'm going to start doing nice things anonymously or without expectations. 
2. Love life by focusing on things that make me happy. I'll start being consciously grateful, keep lists of good things in life and find ways of enjoying everything around me and keeping positive as much as possible.
3. Love myself by finding the ways that I can grow and become the loving positive person I see in my future. 

And through my efforts, maybe I'll inspire others to do the same!  

So, here's to happiness! 

Love, 
Miss K